Apply the 25th Amendment–Now

​It’s way too dangerous to leave Trump in charge for even one more day.

To Vice President Pence, Cabinet members, and Congress: 


Thank you for your courage, those who spoke out and who headed back to the work at hand after the coup. But Americans need to know Trump will not be allowed to continue destroying us, which is why I’ve written what’s below. 

You’ve had over four years’ warning.  Please don’t wait one more day. There’s a deranged monster in the White House. He’s been given an absurd amount of leeway to commit one atrocity after another against our democracy, the American people, and the environment. Americans as well as the rest of the world are horrified, and some are indeed terrified, by his coup attempt.

Don’t leave someone in the White House who does this. Take him out of there, or at least remove all his powers immediately, and let Pence or Pelosi take over until Inauguration day. Stop the damage now, or it will go on and on for the next two weeks. Just before the coup there was evidence of yet another of his myriad cruel decisions made while most of us weren’t looking (we had some distractions, like dying of Covid), as the auction of drilling leases in Alaska’s National Wildlife Refuge were announced. Trump’s sneaky underhanded ways are just one of the many reasons we should have stopped him long ago. 

For weeks overwhelmed hospitals treating Covid have been ignored and abandoned by him. People desperate for vaccines can’t get them since he never even tried to make a national plan, and he lets the states flounder as more people sicken and die. He’s completely without a conscience, and destroys everything he can, often enjoying his own deplorable actions.  Now there’s no telling what his rage will cause him to do. It’s egregiously irresponsible not to remove him.

This was not only a coup, but a coup in a nation struggling for air, reeling from this horrific pandemic, with millions in dire need of any possible relief, the millions this dictator has never cared about. If you don’t act now you will be helping him on his venomous rampage. In the process you’ll be contributing to further suffering and loss of hope, not just for most Americans, but for the world.

Please also waste no time in rounding up the MAGA mob who attacked our capital, and give them some jail time. While they’re in there, force-feed them some lessons in world history and in tolerance. But, with the future in mind, also let them know that Biden will work hard to get good jobs for them so they can feel more secure, since fear–which often leads to anger–seems likely to be a motivator for some of them. ​We need also to find ways to communicate to them about the dangers of cults, which are so often run by c​orrupt or even deranged people. Th​ese attempts to get through to them won’t matter to those who join just because they enjoy committing mayhem or are motivated by hate, but it may sway many others if we do it right.

Meanwhile we can hope and pray that certain Republicans change their ways by not repeating Trump’s methods of messaging such groups and then using them to get more power and money. Any such actions in the future must be condemned, and early on.

The monster’s family needs to leave the White House too, or at least to be completely ignored. The social media sites that blocked Trump and some of his henchpeople ​for twelve hours ​need to keep them blocked much longer. ​It’s good that Facebook will now block them indefinitely. The others should do the same.

We the American people don’t deserve to go through this trauma or to be this scared right now, when many of us are already suffering from severe anxiety, depression, job loss, hunger, and homelessness. The biggest bullies attack the already-downtrodden; it’s so easy. 

You know what you have to do. It’s the right thing. Get the delusional dictator out of the White House, now. He has committed treason. Getting him out is the least you can do.

It’s 2021 and Time for a Change

Only by Working Together can we End Covid, and End Current Shocking Threats to our Democracy

I write about stress in American cities, but of course stress and its relative, depression, are almost everywhere just now. Most of us are feeling pretty low about the pandemic, and frightened about what’s going on in Washington. Just as I was finishing the post, it was announced that President Trump threatened Georgia’s Secretary of State, trying to force him to add made-up votes so it looks like he won in Georgia. It’s amid the furor created as a result of this mob-boss-like attack on our democracy that I want to encourage all of us to work together to protect that democracy, and to end the ravages of this terrible pandemic.

If you’re up on what people are going through with Covid just now you can skip this section, but I’ve put some of the latest here to illustrate all the agony for which one man is largely responsible–Trump. I do have hope that we can triumph over and begin to decrease the travesty and destruction of the past year. It’s hard to maintain that hope, since some of the darkest days in many decades, for our country and much of the world, are now upon us. To begin, here’s what we need to fix:

Hospitals and healthcare workers are stretched to the limit, physically and psychologically, as are of course patients, their families, and the growing numbers of jobless, hungry, and homeless. One nurse feels as if he’s treading water a hundred feet below the surface, trying to reach the top but never getting there, so all he can do is keep treading. Another cries as she describes how she and her colleagues can’t intubate patients who desperately need it, and can’t even sedate them because there aren’t enough supplies. Know that many of this virus’s effects are too unbearable to go through without sedation. With proper leadership at the top this horror would have been fixed immediately. In fact with a different President it never would have occurred.

So misery beyond imagining, for many months now, has been caused by Trump, master of non-caring, who will be forever deemed responsible for the deaths and suffering of many thousands. Think how many might have survived had he taken the reins and acted like a leader. If he couldn’t lead, one hoped he might turn into at least a halfway competent human being with something like a heart rather than a stone in his chest. But now we know better. Or do we?

He’s also raised most of our the blood pressures with his golfing, sulking, and tirades while simultaneously putting our democracy (emphasis on “our”) in danger repeatedly. He doesn’t get that if he succeeds in his power grab that the country will no longer be what it was. It will at best be a shaky shell of itself. He’ll be the president who destroyed the United States.

It’s almost impossible to imagine how, with all of America’s misery laid out right in front of them, Trump and his cowardly buddies don’t even try to hide their belief that the only thing of consequence in this universe is their own wealth, elite position, and power. How can they bear to know people are struggling for their last painful breath, and desperate, exhausted doctors and nurses are trying in vain to comfort and save them, without helping? Right now the doctors don’t even have enough oxygen for patients fighting for air. What kind of monster will Trump’s party be willing to accept as a future leader if they can accept this barbarism as leadership?

The lack of vision, the arrogance, and the sheer depth of utter selfishness are in the open, plain to all of us except perhaps to the unhappy base who live in fear of nonexistent threats and sadly continue to feed their hard-earned dollars to Trump and Co. But it is Trump and Co. who will be excoriated down the centuries. Their actions have lead to one of the most colossal and tragic failures of leadership and morality in the history of the world.

Congratulations, Trump and cronies. You’ll always be remembered.

(Members of Trump’s base, please have a look at the short section following this one, titled Special Message for Trump Supporters and Base. It’s written with the hope that we can work together for a better future.)

When I get depressed, I try to help someone. Happiness experts say it’s one of the best things we can do–good for the helper and helped! There are powerful actions we can take to aid those fighting to help the ill, hungry, and homeless, to preserve our democracy, to turn around climate change, to make peace and not war, to stop hatred, violence, and tyranny of all kinds, and to put an end to the cruelties inflicted on so many by the other bullies and dictators of the world. Even our smallest effort is of enormous value. Just smiling at someone you don’t know is remarkably powerful.

Some other examples of how we all can help:

Give patients, medical workers, necessary workers, and everyone you’re in contact with a chance to remain healthy and able to work by keeping your distance, washing hands often, and wearing a mask. Maybe even two masks when you enter a store, since many people’s masks slip off their noses. It’s more important than ever to do this since now we have many new variants of the virus that are even more infectious. Make sure your mask covers your nose. I walked out of a coffee shop today because the barista’s mask was completely off his nose and he was making my drink. He was also endangering his colleagues at the shop.

If you’re so lucky as to be offered a vaccine, try to fight any fears by educating yourself. If you have allergies or other conditions, ask your doctor to help you figure out if it’s safe for you to take it. The more of us who take it, the faster the pandemic ends. Some of the conditions may take some time to be clarified. I’m very allergic to the anti-nausea drug Compazine. Is that a problem or not? I don’t know yet and my doctor doesn’t either, but she’s trying to find out, and hopefully she’ll know within a few months as more is learned.

If you must wait like me, the best thing you can do is observe all the above safety precautions. The next vaccine that’s developed may be better for you and me if the current ones aren’t. Once we get our shots, whether or not we have known allergies or other conditions, we can make sure they watch us for the recommended time after the shot (I’ve heard both 15 and 30 minutes). It sounds to me as if all of the health workers know to do that. But if they don’t, ask. Make sure they have handy such treatments as Epi-pens, etc. to counter any unexpected reactions. Again it sounds like that’s required wherever they vaccinate.

Volunteer. I hear often about the joy people take in volunteering, have enjoyed it myself, and highly recommend it, though for some of us it’s not yet safe to work next to others. But we can do a lot of good by working on projects at home or by donating to groups who are helping in many causes. Get creative. I read about a woman who converts political yard sign frames into tools for the disabled.

In this atmosphere of violence and hatred that’s been ramped up since Trump appeared, we can do good by simply acting with newly conscious kindness and empathy. Don’t underestimate the power of kindness. We can be kind to neighbors and colleagues, and learn to appreciate, if not love, all people of all sorts, those we know and those we don’t.

Work to stop any suffering you know of, in both humans and animals, including animals raised for food. They are so helpless, and if you don’t think so, go to a farm and pet a lamb or goat. It can change your life. Animal agriculture is one of the biggest casues of global warming.

CharityNavigator.org is a good place to find organizations you can donate to in order to help solve problems and end suffering both near you and throughout the world. Just a few of the many good organizations that I like are World Wildlife Fund, Environmental Defense Fund, Union of Concerned Scientists, World Central Kitchen, and Feed America. Some may have chapters near you where you can help in person.

Help President-elect Biden counteract the destruction by Trump of so much that is precious to our country, our people, and the world. Don’t think politics, just think kindness, empathy, and good, caring leadership, and you’ll know who to depend on and support. Even if Biden isn’t your favorite person, he has a good heart and a lot of wisdom and good will–exactly what we and the world need right now.

Be kind to yourself too. Reach out for help with anxiety and depression if you’re suffering from them. There’s no longer a stigma about this, and if anyone acts as if there is, you don’t need to hang out with them. Almost everyone has experienced those problems at one time or another, some chronically, and especially during this past year. Anyone who hasn’t been depressed during the pandemic is indeed fortunate. If you are depressed or scared or anxious, you’re not alone! Help is there, much of it online with therapists, helpful groups, and more.

One last thing we can do to help turn things around in 2021 is to ask members of Congress to do everything they can to stop the dangerous and selfish charade of Trump and cronies trying to invalidate Biden’s win as our next President, an exercise that endangers our democracy and invites the world’s tyrants to take advantage of us while destroying our reputation as beacon of freedom and justice in the world. These people are participating in nothing less than a coup, an ethical, moral, and existential danger to this country, to your own and your children’s lives, and to all those in the world whose last hope was to get help from the United States of America.

Special Message for Trump Supporters and Base

Give science a chance, even if you’ve been doubting it. Try to see the major questions of our time outside of the political sphere. Use “slow thinking,” which I wrote about a few months ago, and ask yourself if you really find a conspiracy theory or a scary statement you heard to be believable. Check more widely for evidence, beyond the social media or news sites that promote these and other upsetting theories. Away from these sites, it’s widely believed that QAnon is just something someone made up (and may be making them rich as well). Don’t fall for it. It’s a sad, scary way to live. It’s so much better for your mental health just to put your energy into helping others, maybe right there in your community.

Many people from both parties have noted that Trump’s base is being used largely to get more money for Trump to pay his legal and other bills after he’s out of office. You likely haven’t heard it if your news sources are only a few, but if it’s true, is that really where you want your money to go? Do you want to live in the atmosphere of hatred he seems to thrive on? If you believe the pandemic is not real, ask yourself how all this massive suffering and dying could be fake? Why did Trump need special expensive medicines most of us can’t get to cure his own case of Covid? Yet Trump has said again recently that the reported deaths from Covid are “fake news.” It isn’t even remotely possible to fake 350,000 deaths.

About Slow Thinking (a Good Thing), plus an Offer of Friendship from a Democrat to Republicans, Independents, and Undecideds, and a Request for Their Help

A recent program from the TV series Hacking Your Mind explains that while we imagine our conscious minds make most decisions, in fact we go through much of our lives forming quick opinions without even realizing we’re doing it, using what researchers call autopilot thinking. We rarely take time to consciously consider opinons more slowly, which researchers call “slow thinking.” They also find we tend to stick to an opinion we made on autopilot, even if we later discover we were mistaken. We especially stick to it if it’s held by groups we feel we’re part of (Democrat, Republican, White, Black, etc.)  

Knowing about slow thinking and some other ways our minds operate could help Americans right now. But before getting to those, I have a proposal. In hopes our divided nation can come together and solve problems in an atmosphere of civility and empathy, I respectfully ask those who are considering re-electing the president to read what’s below. I come in peace, and write from my heart. I hope you agree at least that rather than the conflict and angry rhetoric we hear so often, it could be so much better (and make us happier) if we could work together to solve our many problems. We might even get to know and like each other. (As I finished this post the president and first lady contracted coronavirus. I wish them a quick recovery, and have left these thoughts mostly as they were, assuming he’ll be able to continue his campaign.) 

Back to Hacking Your Mind, researchers say it’s in our history and genes to want to belong to groups, and to feel a pull to compete with or even fight with other groups. This tendency can lead to an “us versus them” frame of mind. “Us vs. them” thinking oversimplifies and distorts complex problems by dividing the world into an “us” and a “them,” and scapegoating and vilifying” the “them” according to writers for Psychology Today.* We see this in sports, politics, and other areas. 

The writers say there are two theories as to how “us vs. them” occurs.One involves competition. As I understood it, an example might be a country struggling with a terrible economy blames a particular group for it, even though that group has nothing to do with it. (A version of this occurred in Nazi Germany). Or it may arise for reasons concerning identity and self-esteem. One of the writers explains: “the mere categorization of people into an us and a them is enough to produce hostilities.” So if you’re a member of a certain group, you may think it’s natural to feel hostile toward a group that thinks differently, even if it’s full of lots of perfectly nice people. (Note from me: What if the two groups talked about their differences together over coffee? Can we not have some differences without figthing about them?)

Social media has made these tendencies more extreme, for example when it’s used by bad actors who want to get us so angry with each other that we fight with and even kill each other. Hacking Your Mind tells of someone on social media who made up names for two nonexistent groups, and statements that would make each group hostile to the other. They then announced a meeting of each group, on either side of the same street at the same hour. Hundreds of people who had identified with the two groups went to the meeting, and when they realized the others were across the street, began to rage at each other. No doubt this was very satisfying to the instigators, who now must feel they have a lot of power over us. 

This is a terrible side of social media, and makes hopes of peaceful, unified problem-solving hard to hold onto. But we don’t have to fall for it. Slow thinking and vigilance can help us avoid the lure of such fake people and groups, and also of baseless dangerous theories and the often deranged, hate-or-power-obsessed people behind them. It would also help if we used social media less, and demanded that its owners better police themselves. By the way, our using social media is making the owners very wealthy. The site Investopedia tells us:

“If you’re not paying for the product, the product is you. The real transaction here isn’t you receiving enjoyment in the form of a free temporary distraction created by a media company at great expense, but rather, that media company renting your eyeballs to its advertisers.”  

Re “us vs them,” Psychology Today’s Marika Lindholm says today we tend to take sides on all kinds of issues such as vegetarians vs. carnivores, or Coke vs. Pepsi, etc., but some will have more serious consequences than others. A solution she suggests for those is “boundary spanners,” meaning people who belong to multiple groups and social worlds, including immigrants, biracial or bicultural individuals, gay members of the military, and others. She says rather than marginalizing them, we can “honor and empower” them, because they can help us bridge “us vs. them” divisions. For more on this go to:

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/finding-new-home/201908/the-psychology-us-vs-them

Now let’s apply slow versus autopilot thinking to politics. It’s clear Mr. Trump’s decisions please many people, and he’s a magnetic and skilled speaker. But did you ever feel swept up in the moment when everyone was cheering something he said, say at a rally, and then later hear a voice inside you ask, “Do I really go along with that statement?” Your autopilot thinking may have been at work at the rally, but a different decision later may be the result of slow thinking you chose to do when you got away fom the noise. 

I suspect many of us act too often on auto-pilot, not taking time to think through the country’s most serious problems and how we can solve themTake the pandemic. Say you saw photos of people on ventilators and doctors covered in protective equipment, you heard doctors say masks and distancing protect us, you saw many people wearing masks, and photos of huge new grave sites in various countries. Then you heard the president say the virus isn’t that dangerous or is nearly over. You might have made an autopilot decision to believe him, but later in a quiet moment you might have wondered what the real truth was as you slowly considered all the evidence. Even though he now has the virus, many people coming into the White House are still not wearing masks. They see how real the virus is, yet stick with their initial autopilot decisions, even at the risk of their lives!

We can find the truth by researching several sources, and asking ourselves questions such as (in this case) why would a leader we strongly supported lie to us about our own potential suffering and death? Why are so many businesses shuttered? Why do he and those around him get tested constantly, when many of us can’t get a test? Eventually we’d see that Mr. Trump got tested because he did know the virus is dangerous. Yet he needed us to feel calm and safe so we’d agree to opening businesses and schools, and would feel good about things seeming normal again. But why would he urge us to have such a dangerous “normal?” The only answer I see is that  his main goal was re-election, and it didn’t matter to him if more of us suffered and died to make that more possible. Your autopilot opinion may tell you “no way!” about this, but try slow-thinking through the facts and you may change your mind. 

Look at global warming. We’ve lost over four critically-needed years in which we could have slowed it, and not only does Mr. Trump not help, he’s done much to make it worse. As a model to the world he could help leaders work together and with us, to turn this hellish situation around. What’s worse is he does believe global warming is real. In 2009 he was part of a business coalition urging President Obama to take urgent climate action. See this link:

https://sustainabilityx.co/once-upon-a-time-there-was-a-president-that-didnt-believe-in-climate-change-21414c69e829

He has not and will not create national plans to stop the virus and global warming, but there is someone who will: Joe Biden. He’s got well thought out plans for both, having consulted the best experts he could find. Without such plans the pandemic will surely affect us deeply for another year or even more, and economic recovery will take much longer. If we don’t slow global warming we’ll soon see ever-larger areas where drought and heat force mass migrations northward; also more wildfires, loss of our remaining precious natural spaces, tropical diseases such as Dengue fever moving north, and more pandemics, just to start. (For more on this, one of many good places to look is the site of Union of Concerned Scientists.) 

There are many other issues we’ll need to think about carefully, but the virus and climate change certainly are among the most urgent. Joe Biden is intelligent, grasps what’s at stake, knows how to research  a problem, is kind, and will calm our overwhelmed nation and the world. He’s pledged to help people on all sides. So I respectfully beg you, even if you’re fond of Mr. Trump, please do consider at least for this one election voting for Mr. Biden. 

I apologize if anything I’ve written here has offended you. I hope a time comes soon in which feeling offense is rare because despite our differences we’ll have learned to respect each other. We’ll become more aware of our prejudices, substitute kindness for them, make friends with people from diverse groups, and decrease hostile “us versus them” thinking. We’re all human. It can’t be that hard to unite in peace to solve problems, especially with the extra time we’ll have that we used to use to fight and hate. Most important, we’ll gain the gift of new friends. Researchers say that if we want to thrive, the support of many good friends is crucial.     

*Psychology Today article by Arash Emamzadeh  
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/finding-new-home/201908/the-psychology-us-vs-them

Some Ways to End Hatred

This article is mostly about reducing hatred and the misery it causes in America, but in the background is the rest of the world, which I mention because of what it and America now have in common. We and many other countries now stand on a precipice. At the bottom is the hellish existence we all face if we don’t solve several terrible problems we share including global warming, poverty, the decline of mental health, and hatred and its associates racism and anti-semitism. These problems will be solved more easily if all countries collaborate to share ideas and to help each other.

While current U.S. leadership thinks being a loner makes America great, the world is now so small that other countries seem to live just down the block. We need to get busy, with or without presidential help, rekindling old friendships with other countries and repairing strained relationships with them so we can make our efforts at home to stop hatred also become worldwide efforts to stop it. Many cities outside our country are protesting the murder of George Floyd, watching how we handle this moment, and I think rooting for us to find ways to solve these problems.

Our next step here however must be to arrest the officers who did not try to stop the murder. I hope that’s happened by the time this is published. This doesn’t mean they’re guilty and is not a trial. But doing nothing will only incite further protests which may cause more destruction, or cause our unstable president to again make matters worse by intimidating, offending, and harming protesters with absurdly inappropriate military might.

Next, we all need to see and hear serious talk followed by immediate action, about police reform and about equality for all in this country. The president should stay out of it since his only interest as everyone knows is in getting elected again.

There must be ongoing clear communication with the public about how the case is proceeding including plans for a trial, what plans have already been discussed on changing policing, and what else is in the works now to show we’re serious about laws and reforms that will stop this terrible cancer in our culture. The point is the people need to see action now.

To accomplish what must be the immediate raising up of all who are downtrodden here (now an emergency of the highest order) we need not just the help of government leaders but also business leaders. On CNN this past week Martin Luther King III called at one point for large businesses to help. I agree, because with some thought and effort they can help provide or at least encourage creation of more jobs, higher minimum wage, a racism-free work atmosphere, funding for media campaigns that encourage the same, and more. All businesses need to strive to do this, but Big Business’s big money does talk and can get big things done.

Also critical is the need for better laws at federal, state, and local levels, which must include a strong focus on safe and fair voting, ethically-run elections, much more support for the poor, homeless, unemployed and underemployed, fairness, justice, equal opportunity, and elimination of hunger and homelessness. If all this change requires giving checks to everyone below a certain income, that’s what we need to do (see Annie Lowrey’s book Give People Money).

Our government, business leaders, and educational and research institutions all need to support decent housing and ways to provide more healthy food, including eliminating food deserts and repairing and beautifying now-downtrodden neighborhoods, adding to them healing nature with trees and parks, and adding a sense of safe community by helping business owners open stores and establish cafes, coffee shops, etc. that include outdoor seating. All American cities need more of those amenities that add nature and a place to meet and feel community, because researchers say we are chronically nature-starved and too isolated socially for the most part. But poor communities often have not one of these benefits, and the resulting atmosphere adds to their feelings of hopelessness.

Mayors of cities have already banked up a lot of wisdom, and often have to come up with solutions to big problems with no outside help. Both singly and together with other mayors they’ve been wonderfully innovative. In this case we need them to assure citizens first that there will be immediate police reform, and then to help secure the requirements such as better pay and more food that are mentioned above. Governors hopefully will also help with these changes throughout their states. When federal leadership is lacking, governors and mayors have shown they get a great deal done by helping each other, so we can hope that will continue at least until there is a competent president again.

Chiefs of police are clearly also important in this process, and besides being good leaders of the force must be also humanitarian leaders, and teachers in the community. One critical task they have now is to stop allowing people to become police officers who were once playground bullies, or who ever showed the slightest indication of a bent toward cruelty, sadism, or obsession with weapons, or showed any other psychopathology.

Psychologists who understand police work, then, need to be hired to develop tests and interviews that reveal such personalities, so they are not hired. Once officers are cleared and hired, they should be required to sign contracts that.pledge to respect and treat humanely every individual they encounter. They need to be coached in helping to reduce racism and hatred in their communities, and informed that any actions or comments to the contrary will not be tolerated. Oversight and laws will probably be needed to ensure that these changes are made and adhered to.

The media and ad agencies can help us reach an entire swath of people who are prejudiced in many different ways and for many reasons. Some hate anyone not white, others hate Jews, the list goes on. They’re out there and we’ll probably never know how many there are, but the idea is to reach them and try to help them see why it’s best for everyone including them not to continue this way. This requires educating people wherever possible, not just in school and at home but in workplaces, on TV with messages and shows suitable for both kids and adults, and on billboards, posters, and signs in front of homes as we already see now in some places.

I’ve always believed, perhaps being too much of an optimist, that civilization would finally evolve, becoming kind, empathetic, and wise. Here and there there’s been a glimmer of hope, but given our problems now, that’s not enough. The time to evolve is here. It’s too late for a slow change because this is an emergency. I believe we can do it, and the rest of the world might just follow.

Let the murder of George Floyd help carry us to that new place we should have gotten to long before now. In this new evolved era we’ll need to understand that to stop hate, nothing is likely to work as well as the power of kindness and empathy. Many of us don’t think about these concepts often, so the concepts might have to be taught, and then practiced. Still, good laws will be needed as backup to protect the rights of all during those times when some forget to practice this new ethic of kindness.

Many cynics, or other people who somehow enjoy feeling prejudice, may sneer at the idea of kindness, empathy, and generosity being the norm, and the accepted way to work, govern, and live. Let them. Then remind them that the alternative is further disintegration into the tragic morass in which we now find ourselves. Explain that we all need people to recognize that hate and fear of others gets in the way of happiness for everyone, and often causes much of the harm and suffering in our world.

Teachers in our schools can help deliver this message by promoting kindness and empathy in the classroom and on the playground. They can stop bullies immediately, and then teach them why that behavior is so bad for them and for the world. If the children are bullied at home they need to be counseled and helped. There should be school psychologists available who can help detect whether there is abuse at home or in the child’s neighborhood.

Although many have tried unsuccessfully in the past, each of us needs to continue to encourage and model that because someone’s color or religion is different there is no need to fear or hate them, and that we can all be friends, and benefit a great deal from the friendship. It needs to be a ubiquitous message, at least until there is change. We need to emphasize that friends are important, and that it’s wonderful to have many of all kinds because the mental health boost given us by having such a supportive community is said by researchers to make us happier and even more physically healthy. More happy people seem likely to help to make the world a happier, less violent place. We need to get across that being together as one people is actually possible, and is much better for us than division and hate. Children need to get this message too, early and often.

To further encourage this togetherness, I can report that rapper Killer Mike, asked by Stephen Colbert on his show what else we all can do to help, requested that we donate to and/or volunteer to work with one or more of the many grassroots organizations trying to help African Americans in many cities, such as Movement for Black Lives, and commit to doing this for some time.

I’ve mentioned ad experts and the media. They can help by crafting and showing messages and PSAs that remind us that treating others kindly is no longer just a nice thing but is essential, and that not getting to know those who are different out of fear and old hatreds makes our lives much duller and surely less joyful. I’m no ad expert but here are some of my (rough) ideas for marketing slogans, which I imagine might have some good art to accompany them: “Love people. Most of us are really cool,” or “Love. It feels so much better than hate,” or “Most people are fascinating. Don’t hate them. Get to know them!” And there’s an older one that’s still good: “Live and Let Live,” or another version of it I came up with: “Live and Help Others Live.”

A nationwide deep apology is also now called for, and it should come from every business and government leader.

We can do this. The wrongs that have been done are clear. If we can’t make this cultural shift toward changing from hate to love, then the tyranny and suffering will continue. If we can’t manage to turn toward kindness as the American way of life, we are not only pathetic, we are lost.

IN MEMORIAM

For a Country and a Planet

The planet, a diverse paradise of oceans, rivers, mountains, forests, and plants and animals of unimaginable beauty, was the only one in its solar system inhabited by all these, and by sentient beings called humans, or people. Many of the people lived joyous, peaceful lives, yet some sometimes became ill with unfounded fears about each other that led to hatred, tyranny, and even wars they never learned to prevent even though each was more terrible than the last. Eventually their weapons became more ferocious, until they were so powerful they could destroy large swaths of the planet and all that lived on it. 

Despite it being clear that humans were imperfect and often made mistakes or became unbalanced, no one stopped the creation of the weapons and the use of materials that could make more of them. Neither did they stop creating smaller weapons that caused murders of many of the people by only a few individuals. It seemed that no one could stop them because powerful groups of people who were addicted to weapons would not allow it. There was more and more killing followed by crippling sadness in people who lost those they loved.  

Some of the most powerful people were so consumed with their own desires that they ignored the suffering of all others, including the people whose loved ones were killed in mass slaughters. It became clear many were killed mostly because they were not the same white color as most of those in power, or prayed in a different way from them. During this same period, many of the powerful also ignored the looming demise of the planet, as it grew sick from toxins created by the peoples’ industries, showing its grave need through increasingly dangerous fires, storms, deaths of species, and destruction of the natural areas that made it so beautiful. In the end the powerful people let the desperate planet struggle until it died, taking with it all living beings, most of whom had been innocent, kind, and good. 

The pieces of land called countries had looked for guidance to one country considered the greatest, whose founders had possessed great vision. But in this country’s latter days one of its temporary leaders, elected under murky circumstances never completely understood, began to talk of permanently extending the job he had already made into something like the reign of a king. Unlike his predecessors, he was mad and sick with power and greed, and devoid of the great human quality of empathy. He worked both openly and in secret to undermine every effort of those fighting to save the people, the country, and the planet from each other’s weapons and from the planet’s illnesses. 

He soon was acknowledged as the country’s first leader desiring to be what people called a dictator. These were the worst leaders in this world’s history, and always left suffering and death in their wake. Though already wealthy and powerful, he took advantage of his position to gain yet more, despite the cost to the country and the planet. To this end he put in powerful positions people who thought as he did or who would do what he commanded without question. 

The people began to suffer from fear and grief as they watched him destroy laws and rules that had protected them and their beautiful world, and make new ones that made them feel unsafe, causing endless worry and stress. They saw him align himself with other dictators, and with a growing group of people that, like some similar groups in the past that were responsible for murdering millions, spread hatred of all those different from them. They watched him befriend yet others who seemed to love weapons, and who, when grieving families worked to ban them, blocked their every attempt. It didn’t matter to the dictator or his allies how many lives the weapons took. Their turning away from the suffering created a well of sorrow in the country so wide and deep that an anguished cry for the country’s sake was heard throughout the planet. Yet they let the deaths and the mourning of the people, and the destruction of the beautiful planet go on and on. All that seemed to matter to them was wealth and power. The dictator himself believed he was all-powerful, as indeed he seemed to be.  

He and his associates came to symbolize to the people all that was immoral, unethical, cruel, and–in the end we would have to say–evil. Some who could have stopped him were afraid of losing their own positions, so remained silent and continued to obey him. They too became symbols of cruel indifference. The people began to call them all by a name reserved in their history for those they’d reviled the most: traitors. The powerful had betrayed with stunning heartlessness their fellow humans, the great country’s founders, and the beautiful planet with its marvelous creatures.

Who can say if there will ever again exist such a wondrous world, or beings similar to those of that planet, now lost to us? The creator or whatever force made it would have to find a way to make intelligence in each being a trait infused with abhorrence of hate, greed, and tyranny. All people including leaders would need to be born with generosity and the desire for peace ingrained in their very cores. Until such a marvelous thing occurs, all we can say further about this world that contained so much raw material from which could be made such a beautiful existence, is that we miss it, and we will long mourn its passing.

No Excuses

No Excuses

Around the world people are starving, others are suffering as war rages around them, water resources are endangered, rain forests are disappearing, the ever more dangerous effects of climate change are increasing, and fellow humans at home are under constant attack by people filled with hate, Instead of being a world leader in attacking these problems, our country’s leaders are busy avoiding the wrath of the NRA while mass murders continue to accelerate.

There is no excuse for this kind of supremely selfish, cowardly behavior in those in power in what used to be the leader of the free world. It’s an atrocity that background checks and banning assault weapons is even under discussion as people are mowed down or lie in hospitals wounded and dying, and millions of others  fear for their lives and the lives of their children.

Stringent background checks and banning of ALL assault weapons and ways to make them should be immediate with NO DISCUSSION.

To do less or wait one minute longer can be considered nothing other than immoral, unethical, and yes, criminal. Leaders who are blocking this, and NRA, this is what you are will be remembered for.

A Note to and for Haters, Killers of All Kinds, and Certain Government Officials

I’ve been writing about hate and killing for some time now since they’re hardly compatible with my goal of helping us create less-stressed American cities. I agree with many of the suggestions offered by caring people about these matters, and here add my own specific ones, some of which may seem naive but–some readers tell me–that help them to feel more hopeful. I realize some of these suggestions will seem extreme to some (such as no guns, period). Yet in the end we have to get our heads out of the sand and acknowledge that the problems we to need solve in order to stop the violence are deeply embedded in our society, encouraged by leaders who are part of those problems. So it shouldn’t be surprising that the changes needed are dramatic. 

Our problems are not just from the bigotry now being considered fine by some, or from fear of those not like us, but also from our general acceptance of violence and weapons as necessary. Neither prejudice nor guns are necessary in a civilized society, and if we made the society more civilized with laws and whatever else it takes to show we value lives and peace, more of us would see that. (Isn’t a civilized society the goal? ) It’s not normal that some people see hate and violence as normal.

Each time there’s a massacre and whenever there’s cruelty or killing, I find I’m thinking the same thought. That is that along with gun control (at least) and the other changes most sensible people want, we also need deep and thoughtful change in our culture, and much of it should involve promoting kindness and empathy at every level and in every corner of the culture. Maybe that kind of change is what will finally convince those in elected office or otherwise in power that when they don’t act to stop mass murder and suffering, when their own personal goals come before the lives of others, they must accept some of the blame.

FOR THOSE WHO HATE

(The bold print below is accidental and so far we’ve been unable to return it to normal print. Please read as regular print–thanks.)

If you hate a certain group of people, or even one person, there are numerous ways you can turn off that hate, and it’s a good idea to try to do that. If you were trained to hate–and most people who hate have been trained–you owe it to others, to the world, and mostly to yourself to un-train yourself. There are many ways to do this. Practice empathy and kindness even if that’s new for you. Stop hanging out with other haters, and do whatever else you can to get yourself to the other side where you can learn about and begin to care for your neighbors. If you get to know your neighbors or acquaintances of other colors or backgrounds you’ll likely find they’re really cool people, nice to be with, and often have interesting life stories to tell. If you ask you’ll learn about their cuisine, how they like to party, what they miss from back home and what they love here. Your own life story is also of great interest–everyone’s is. So why not tell it to them, while removing prejudice, fear, rage, and cruelty from your mind. Then your life has a better chance to end up a happy and peaceful one, which is much harder to accomplish if you live in a cloud of hatred. 

Remind yourself that people can’t help where they were born, what color their skin is, or who their parents are. Put yourself in their shoes if they’re not like you, and stay there a few minutes. Realize that all most of them want is a chance to have a reasonably happy, healthy life, like you do. Many of us struggle with how to do that, and the struggle is hard enough without having to deal with hatred, violence, and the horrific loss of life mass shooters cause. 

If you’re still consumed with hate or the urge to harm, ask for help. One place you can get it is to google local mental health resources in your area and try to connect with one. One helpful national site (and group) is MHFA or Mental Health First Aid. Try going there to see their huge list of resources that can help with any kind of mental illness or pain. One of many helpful pages there is https://www.mentalhealthfirstaid.org/mental-health-resources/

Or go to a place online that’s about more positive emotions such as ways to be happier. One of many sites that may be helpful is https://www.sparringmind.com/be-happy/ . Or learn about how prejudices are formed, at a site like Very Well Minds, on this page:  https://www.verywellmind.com/what-is-prejudice-2795476 

If you’ve read any history you may know that often the reasons people are taught to hate are based on false premises. A common human weakness is to find someone else to blame for our troubles even when it makes no sense. Other people may harm us at times, sure, but when entire groups, races, or religions are made into scapegoats you can bet the reasons for it don’t ring true. So stop believing things you hear coming out of the mouths of racists and bigots and get over your prejudices that some pathetic, clueless website, friend, or relative taught you. 

Look the rest of us straight in the eye and tell us that if you didn’t live here and were being persecuted or threatened, that you wouldn’t want to come to a freer country like this one where you thought you could be safe and have at least some kind of work. Persecuted people and refugees have done this throughout history. You know you’re a hypocrite if you say you wouldn’t do the same. Many immigrant families by the way come from places where family ties are close. This often makes them secure and loving people just because close families often foster those good feelings. That means they’re very nice people to know. All such families I’ve met tend to be warm, caring, and kind.

So please come out of the dark ages and stop accusing them of things they aren’t doing, and stop trying to hurt them. Maybe even try this: help them. Helping people makes the helper happier–too many researchers have found that to be true for you to doubt it. Try it. You’ll like it.

GUNS & THE ACT OF KILLING  

A great many people, myself included, believe there’s no excuse for killing for any reason, period. In fact by now we should have evolved enough as a species to be done with all killing including that done in wartime as a way to solve problems (we should be done with war as well). But even if we’re temporarily forced to participate in or suffer through wars by greedy, angry, selfish, and power-mad leaders, we don’t have to also kill each other at home.

As for guns themselves, they don’t belong in a peaceful, civilized society, end of story. Hunters, you won’t like this, but even killing animals for whatever reason has got to bring out something in you that cringes, doesn’t it? Truly evolved humans, in my view, should abhor inflicting pain on any other living thing. As long as a bunch of us go ahead and kill things (and most of us really don’t need that deer meat do we?) it will be easier for humans to find killing and maiming okay. 

That’s why I believe guns of ANY kind should be banned, and nothing short of that is acceptable. I’m not a naive wacko, I’ve just had enough. Haven’t you? Let’s say you still insist on having a gun. Whether or not you’re a member of the NRA, don’t you find it outrageous and kind of sickening that this group that tries to keep lots of guns around at all costs actually controls many of our elected officials? 

TO CERTAIN GOVERNMENT OFFICIALS

You’re not fooling anyone when you act only to protect your title as representative or senator or President, while letting suffering and injustice continue. No rep of mine who does that will ever get my vote again. Act to protect people from hate and gun violence now, and get ALL of it done, not just tiny steps.  And no I don’t want the death penalty–that’s just more violence, cruelty, and death.  Enough. 

OTHER KILLING IN OUR CULTURE ADDS TO THE GENERAL VIOLENCE

Because I believe that killing anything makes killing something else easier, I also believe we should stop the horrifying practice of animal agriculture. We may not personally hear the tortured, terrified cries of animals headed to and going through slaughter, but we know they’re out there, 24 hours a day. We know unless we lie to ourselves that that pain we cause, directly, or indirectly with our dollars, can’t be good for us either. When we do such things to other living things it should ring alarm bells in us, and I believe it would go along way toward creating a happier, more peaceful culture if we paid attention to those alarms.

Besides it also being awful for the environment and the fact that we can feed many more people with plants, continuing this practice means a certain number of humans–many who would rather not have such jobs but can find no other—will be forced to carry out that cruelty for hours a day even if it causes them great personal pain (the evidence is that it does for many of them, and they are never the same again).


I’m convinced that one day slaughtering for food as well as hunting for “sport” will be universally decried for the barbarous acts they are, that we’ll be seeing very few mass killings of people then as well, and that those two changes will be at least somewhat connected. This is why I include comments about animal killing when I write about hate and mass shootings of humans. Killing and causing suffering is too widely accepted in our culture, even though most of us don’t participate. It’s in the air too much. So I’m suggesting a holistic approach to stopping violence by stopping all violence of all kinds, so we get out of the habit of seeing and accepting it.

(Note: For a more detailed piece on some of these ideas, go to this blog’s first-ever post, written after the Parkland massacre.)